Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Spreading the kindness:Pay it forward!

It is a normal human nature to reciprocate or to give back towards someone who has being kind or has lend their hands to us especially during our hard times. Many of the people that feels indebted with the kindness that has been given by a particular person will definitely thinks that it is a must to give back or to repay him or her as an expression of gratitude.

Yeah, that is what normally being done by most of us. But how about paying the good deed by having it done to the others instead of the person? This act or concept is described as "Pay it forward". Analogically assume that the normal way of expressing a gratitude towards a Good Samaritan is like a ball game between two players. Imagine the ball is the good deed that being passed on to each other, while for the Pay it forward concept, it can be imagined as similar as a football game whereby, each player in the same team will keep on passing the ball to each other in order to score a goal. Therefore, the difference between the common way of appreciating a good deed and "paying it forward" is the numbers of persons that will be involved. And of course, the kindness and sincerity can be spread out

I've first heard this concept after watching a film with a similar title.

Pay It Forward (2000) Image taken from

The story is about how a 12 years old schoolboy is attempting to make the world better (in a fulfilment of his school assignment). His Idea of Pay it forward is by doing a good deeds towards three different persons. In return, each of them should reciprocate by paying it to another 3 different persons. If the movement continue, it will create a huge pyramid effect (similar with the multilevel marketing technique) enabling the concept to be spread. Well, I will never tell the rest of the story or the synopsis in here as I am strongly suggesting yourself to watch it to get an inspiration!

Personally, I think the Pay it forward concept can be a better fit in the society nowadays. Since people especially in the urban area are more secluded, spreading a movement of kindness starting in a small community will assist in encouraging people to interact and appreciate between each others.

Talking about the connection of this concept and the relationship between people, it does reminds myself of a conversation with a friend of mine that working as a volunteer for the organisation that helping the Orang Asli (Indigenous People). She said that, while helping the villagers we will definitely get something in return, such as their way of living will teach us on how to live harmoniously with the nature, and most important, the knowledge that has been given to them will assist in their capacity building. They can utilize that to help their own community and create an internal chain of effect among themselves. Thus enabling them to improve their quality of living.

Well, happen to know that social enterprises and voluntary movements are mushrooming nowadays, why not this concept is being applied to ensure a continuous effect of the action? Therefore empowerment can be given to the related community and individual that not only will guarantee the kindness to be spread, but also the assisted parties will be able to stand in their own feet."

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime"

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Self Acceptance..

Back again.. I just realized that it has been 2 years since my last post. Definitely there are numbers of bitter-sweet experiences that I've been through,and of course all of them are worth to be remembered. After battling for 5 years in my tertiary studies, I've finally reached the peak whereby, my final dissertation (Thesis) has been submitted and another week to go before I can complete the chapter of my undergraduate life, the final exam!!


Alright, straight to the point of this sharing, I would like to talk about the great lesson that I've learnt throughout the final year of my varsity life, the "self acceptance" or about accepting yourself entirely, both of your inner side or physical outlook, your surrounding and so on..

To relate this with myself, I am a passionate person who really likes to aim high and push myself the best that I can.I can't be categorized as a smart or a high flying student, but for me the most important is whatever things that I am doing and the aim that I am pursuing, I always push the best that I can. Similar in as in the race, I always aiming for my "PB" or Personal Best. Therefore, usually, I will set up a target within the range that I am capable to achieve.

However, between this passionate behaviour,lies a negative attitude whereby, I really like to compare what I have and my achievements with the rest. Because one of my principle is, "it is OK for not being the highest achiever, but what I will obtain must be among the significant when it is compared with the rest and most important for me is the amount of satisfaction that I will get". When I didn't get the things that I want or being left far behind compare to the rest of the competitors, I'll definitely surrounded by the feeling of self-inferiority, stress and not to mention the level of disappointment that I will have.. It can be related with the law of physics, the higher the climb, the greater the pull of the gravitational force, and of course the greater the pain when you fell down.

Of course I will get up and continue the fight for redemption, but the feeling of guilty, sadness, and regret are hard to be eradicated and sometimes, it does wandering inside my head, especially when I am alone and have nothing to do. Sometimes, there are moments that I am looking down at myself and start whispering that I am still not good enough compare to the rest and of course it contributes towards the unhappiness and definitely the lack of confidence. I still remember, the failure to get the result that I want making myself drown in my emotion for few days, at that time I keep on saying that I am not good enough yet.. And it happen again when my project wasn't short listed for competition. I keep saying that I am such a failure..

My routine daily life continues.. Usually, I'll allocate around 5 minutes every morning once I get up, to read some inspirational quotes, stories and sharing (an important cross-training for my mind). 3 weeks ago, while surfing the YouTube for some motivational videos, I watched a clips about Nick Vujicic. An Australian guy who was born without both arms and only a small part of limb, he is not only enjoying his life but, without any hesitance, he is willing to share his stories to inspire the rest of the people.

"I love living life, I am Happy!"

Vujicic really likes to say the phrase in his sharing. This is very interesting because a person that is definitely considered by us as a physically disabled, is able to utilize his own capacity to live the life to the fullest and be happy. So how about ourself that is physically complete? What I can see in him is his attitude of Self Acceptance. Wholeheartedly, he accepts whatever that he has, especially his physical attributes and did not comparing himself with the rest who are physically perfect. And I realized that, misfortunes or set back does appeared throughout the journey of our life and of course the experience is different between each of us. However, it will never be able erase our capacity to live the life to the fullest and still enjoying the daily gifts that we obtained from above. Back to my own experience, it is hard to forget the failure, but the "wound" will be cured faster and your daily living will be meaningful if you are able to make yourself happy with what do you have right now.

Always appreciate small wonders in your daily life

Self dissatisfaction sometimes caused me to keep on comparing myself between the rest of my friends that I considered much better than me. By doing this, it making myself taking for granted of the things that I have. Whether it is big or small, it will make a difference to someone else who is less fortunate. This reminds myself about the story of Neil Pasricha, which has been devastated by his divorce and another lost when his best friend committed suicide. Left with his family, he started his blog, the 1000 awesome things(, describing about all the small joys that we will usually ignore, e.g a cashier open up a new lane in a grocery store, or getting a clean underwear from the drier. It does sounds ridiculous and funny, however it is still can be a wonder in our daily life. For me, things such as having a great numbers of awesome friends, lovable family, foodies, and opportunity to acquire numbers of awesome experiences is wonderful and should be appreciated. Remembering that we are blessed and fortunate compare to some of our counterparts will cultivate the Self acceptance. Thus, happiness will "automagically" comes!

The Book of Awesome by Parischa

At the peak of Gunung Datuk. A climb with a group of awesome friends can be considered as one of the wonderful things in my life!!

Accept the outcomes of your own efforts

It is very important to do the best that we can during the timeline given to accomplished an objective. However,recently I did realized that in order to move on to the next task or the new stage in our daily life, it also very important to let go all the doubt and the regret that we have experienced during or after the process of accomplishment.

As there is a parable saying that: "Dead by gone, be by gone" things happened during that time is already happened. Having a head-banging feeling of regret will never change the past, hence it will be an additional burden in your head that will be hindering yourself from accomplishing the next task. This is exactly what I am experiencing after my poster presentation (selection for the project competition) and when reading my dissertation (draft thesis) that I did not managed to proofread before submitting. Also, since we did the best that we can, there is no point to keep on comparing with what we have done and what we are getting with the rest of the people, since we did the best that we can. Therefore another lesson that I've learnt is to appreciate the moments or the chances that has been given to fulfil any objectives or task. Thus, accepting and appreciating your own achievement is very important.

Not to be mistaken with this blogpost.. This is my exact reaction after reading back my dissertation!

Quoted from somewhere, "Every new day is another chance to change your life." Therefore, there is no point to regret for your past failures. Loving and accepting yourself wholeheartedly will definitely bring joys in your daily life. :)

Monday, November 22, 2010

Nothing Much to say..

It has been months since after my last update.. And for sure many things have zapping by with the numbers of stories and also bitter sweet experience.. Ya, last semester I've did face many issue, many new things and also various of bitter sweets experience..

Ok, now the time zapp again.. Now we are having a final exam.. err... ya I have nothing much to comment (mood kinda ruined by the freaky Corporate Ethics paper=.=")

The next will be two days after this.. Freaking programming again, but will do the best that I can.

Then so on and so on..

Next post will be about the freedom from examination (until December next year)and my relocation to KL!!!!

See you again!!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Brooklyn and the story behind...

One of the valid evidence of the phrase "Impossible is nothing" is shown by the tall standing and famous Brooklyn bridge.

In 1883, a creative engineer named John Roebling was inspired by an idea to build a spectacular bridge connecting New York with the Long Island. However bridge building experts throughout the world thought that this was an impossible feat and told Roebling to forget the idea. It just could not be done. It was not practical. It had never been done before.

Roebling could not ignore the vision he had in his mind of this bridge. He thought about it all the time and he knew deep in his heart that it could be done. He just had to share the dream with someone else. After much discussion and persuasion he managed to convince his son Washington, an up and coming engineer, that the bridge in fact could be built.

Working together for the first time, the father and son developed concepts of how it could be accomplished and how the obstacles could be overcome. With great excitement and inspiration, and the headiness of a wild challenge before them, they hired their crew and began to build their dream bridge.

The project started well, but when it was only a few months underway a tragic accident on the site took the life of John Roebling. Washington was injured and left with a certain amount of brain damage, which resulted in him not being able to walk or talk or even move.

"We told them so."
"Crazy men and their crazy dreams."
"It`s foolish to chase wild visions."

Everyone had a negative comment to make and felt that the project should be scrapped since the Roeblings were the only ones who knew how the bridge could be built. In spite of his handicap Washington was never discouraged and still had a burning desire to complete the bridge and his mind was still as sharp as ever.

He tried to inspire and pass on his enthusiasm to some of his friends, but they were too daunted by the task. As he lay on his bed in his hospital room, with the sunlight streaming through the windows, a gentle breeze blew the flimsy white curtains apart and he was able to see the sky and the tops of the trees outside for just a moment.

It seemed that there was a message for him not to give up. Suddenly an idea hit him. All he could do was move one finger and he decided to make the best use of it. By moving this, he slowly developed a code of communication with his wife.

He touched his wife's arm with that finger, indicating to her that he wanted her to call the engineers again. Then he used the same method of tapping her arm to tell the engineers what to do. It seemed foolish but the project was under way again.

For 13 years Washington tapped out his instructions with his finger on his wife's arm, until the bridge was finally completed. Today the spectacular Brooklyn Bridge stands in all its glory as a tribute to the triumph of one man's indomitable spirit and his determination not to be defeated by circumstances. It is also a tribute to the engineers and their team work, and to their faith in a man who was considered mad by half the world. It stands too as a tangible monument to the love and devotion of his wife who for 13 long years patiently decoded the messages of her husband and told the engineers what to do.

Perhaps this is one of the best examples of a never-say-die attitude that overcomes a terrible physical handicap and achieves an impossible goal.

Often when we face obstacles in our day-to-day life, our hurdles seem very small in comparison to what many others have to face. The Brooklyn Bridge shows us that dreams that seem impossible can be realised with determination and persistence, no matter what the odds are.

Even the most distant dream can be realized with determination and persistence.

This story has given myself a great lesson. Adversity should not be a reason on why we can't fulfill our dreams and ambitions, and also the related obligations.. As long we want to do it, and we have a full heart to do it, for sure the dream can be seized! Carpe Diem!! XD

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Back again..

Explicit and Amusing South Park....

It's been a centuries left after my last post.. i'm so lazy to update this lousy blog maybe because most of my times are being fulfilled with my campus activities or you just can assume that i'm a lazy bump in terms of thinking and writing on what i want to post...

Hmm... i think it is more that 5 months since my last post.. so many things are happening. If you notice in my last post i did mentioned about taking my medications which i really hate!! I would like to say that now i'm so happy to announce that my 10 months medication is already stop!! Woohoo!

Oh, by the way, Wishing you a happy and a prosperous Chinese New Year! And happy St. Valentine's day! just now i went to St. Michael Church, uniquely this year they give Ang Pau to those who attend the sunset mass! Thank You XD!!!! About Valentine's Day? Of course a lonely Valentine as usual..

Ump.. so still waiting.. next 2 days of CNY break.. what i want to do?? Beside of my training and ass-singments...

And also the new post for this lovely lousy blog..

That's all for now...


Saturday, August 8, 2009

Break Free!

Silent doesn't neccessarily mean golden..

Hari ini dalam sejarah!

A week ago is the most silent and bored holiday i ever had.. It's just happen due to the command of the Health department to close the campus for 1 week in order to curb down the spread of the influenza like ilness.. Iniatialy, i was planned to go back, but since the fear of the virus due to my low immunity, and the exorbitant airplane tickets the intention is cancelled.. Better! Save more bucks and also better for my health... But being a week in UTP without any access to outside world (beside the phone and the internet connection) the boredom really made us mad... It's made me think agaian about my decision.. few time i ask, am i regret? But it isn't so bad! After the killing jail period is over, me and my buddies went out to Ipoh for an outing.Blowing out the boreness really make a relief and giving me a such of motivation.
It is on Thursday or weekday! What a very nice time, people are very few, so the place is isn'tcrowded... There is only a short que for tickets and we din't need to rush-over just to catch the new higlited movie! G.I Joe...

While waiting... Utilizing my skinny long hand to take a shot... Jason, where and what are you looking at??

Beside of cinema, this is also a right and a nice time for shopping! I was looking around in a DVD shop when suddenly i found a DVD of my anime characters are team up to solve the mystery and fight the vicious crime! Lupin The 3rd and Detective Conan!

Lupin Vs. Conan The Movie!

Hmm... ok it's time to watch G.I Joe... What a fantastic storyline and C.G.I technology that being used! This fantastic story has drop down my personal ranking movie of the year at this time, Tranformer should become number 2 now! To further criticize: Pro's: Creative and nice story line, Hi-tech and nice CGI, and lastly full of action! Con's: Why using my name (Rex>>Count) for the main antagonist character! *Sigh*

Owh, beside that, i did went to the MPH in order to hunt for a new mag! But suprisingly, i found this book....

Ha..ha.. ancaman a.k.a Threat?More.... ump, i have no comment...

Ok, relek lah.... don't need to bother about it. This is Malaysia.. So I just pick up a copy of my favourite magazine

But the urgent, or the main intention in this outing is to have a nice food after the whole week we are force feeding ourself with the unutritious campus' foods or instant noodles.. So, i suggest the next destination is Bercham! The Ipoh's foods heaven! Without knowing particularly the nice eateries over there, we just take a random stop in one of the reastaurant..... The result is awesome! Smile.. while enduring the eating lust!

Believe it or not? It is for RM35!!!

Nice Aroma!

Tada!!!!! Reaped out!

Ooopssss... it seems i forgot something... i bought a powerful thirts quenching fluid!


Ending the trip, we decided to shout and sing, a therapy relief for those who are depress...

My roomie and his lover.. Duet!

Romeo feeling.. singing a jiwa2 song lol....

Nasib baik tidak hujan ha..ha!! This is one of the nicest outing i ever had in UTP.....

Monday, August 3, 2009

About the past , the nostalgias and the present

It's all about what we will do on what we have!

When i seat back and relax it's sometimes reminds me about the memories that i left behind. Related with the title of my blog, i would like to relate the things that were happen in the past and the present. So distinct.. firstly, i will be really grateful and glad for those achievement and all the belongings that i have now, it is so praiseworthy and keeping myself aware that continuous effort and the attitude of keep on working until the last drop of sweat is so important (though most of it are not so big or so superior can be gauge in the monetary amount, but i 'm so glad to have it). Few years before, especially 5 years ago, things are so much differ than now, beginning with a mix-pouring emotion as a secondary school student, me and the buddies were aiming high to achieve the dreams, to get a great tertiary education or entering the university (of course, it is normal for a typical school boy). The afternoon time is being full filled by the hostel's routines and duties such as doing school homework and revision accordingly by the schedule provided. As a hostel boy, i'm only will met my parents once in a week during the church service, each week advices and motivation are given, and it does boost up my spirits, and also fading down my disappointment that are always occur, especially due to my poor performance in my study. At school also i will not be able to forgot my class (form 4 and 5, the only pure science class in my school) are divided unto 2 group or more familiarly known as "pole" a name that given by our english teacher about the situation in our classroom. And due to that, conflics and the differencess of opinions are always occur... but we are still united as one! What a differences or i usually call it spices that has bind us together! Ok, back to my dreams or our dreams... Me and the buddies, that consist of 6 of us were usually together, nothing that separate us, except the current situation where all of us are moving out due to fullfill the ambition or to pursue the studies. And i still remember our promise that we would not be separated and will be together if can in a same college and Uni, but i'm the one who the first that unable to fullfill it... and 4 of us who the dreams is to be in the medical school.. ended by only 2 were managed... and others are going to the different fields, as myself now. I will never forget the time that usually spend at the cyber cafe for lan gaming, the noise that we made in both public and school library, and also the time that we were punished due to miss appropriate manner at the schools, it is so sweet until will make me smile alone.. But the most important is about my family in the past years, where my Daddy is still there and continuosly giving myself a support and encouragement, he is always the first to enlighthen me up, cheering me, and giving myself a lot of advise beside of my mom and my other siblings and friends. But sadly, 2 years ago, about two weeks before i left for my studies, he leave us forever. Now, compare to the time that i've mentioned just now, situations changes a lot where time is superiorly flying very fast, meeting my family for just twice a year (normal cycle of the semeseter studies of the undergraduate) and also responsibilities that i hold now, the organisations that i involve and also what i need to fullfill as an undergraduate. Personally i will say that i'm proud and happy to be in this level and also gratefull for it, but off course i would not be easily content and promise to keep the hard work and to improve it from time to time. I also happy that God has given me an opportunity to know alot of people from a different background with a different view. But the most important are the supports and the prayer from both my Mommy and late Daddy, they taught and guide myself, so i never be easily satisfy and always keeping the effort and faith towards the almighty God! Honestly, the significant things that make myself feel so diference about now than in the past is not about who am i now and where do i am, but since Daddy left us or passed away, i'm personally feel my emotion in a deep sorrow and sadness, and i dint' have any words or phrase that will be able to mention that how i deeply miss him, not that i cannot accept the truth that he is no longer with us, but deep inside my heart i did not know how to express the lonelyness that i need to endures every days. I did able to control it day by day, but i do still miss him, and also it would remind me about mommy who is the bravest and the strongets woman ever. Sorry guys that this post is full scrap and unorganized manner of writing.. but t does make me feel satisfy and able to flow out my emotions...

Thanks for reading!

About Me

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My full name is Rex Alvin Francis, a native Dusun hail from the North Borneo. A small town boy with a big city dream, I am very passionate passion.